Mr Poodle's poodle yaps

If Tony Blair has been George Bush's poodle abroad, Jack Straw has been Mr Blair's poodle at home.

As Home Secretary, Jack Straw's tactic was to wring his hands and do nothing. As Foreign Secretary his job was to scuttle round the world to prepare a red carpet for his master. His performances in the Commons became increasingly bumbling, and it was not surprising that he was demoted - to lead the Commons, an inconvenient institution which Mr Blair considers should do his bidding and therefore an ideal place to be "led" by a poodle.

Mr Straw has now pronounced on the subject of english votes on english issues. It would cause "chaos and confusion", he said, according to The Herald. And, as we predicted, he played the hybrid bill card.

"Imagine if each 'bit' of a Bill has been certified as English or UK. There's an English 'bit'. Then an English MP proposes extending this 'bit' to Scotland in some way. Divisions would be a farce.

"This chaos and confusion would be replicated within government. It is difficult to see how Britain could be effectively governed in such circumstances," he added.

Hm, chaos and confusion in government. Sound familiar? Is he seriously suggesting a government would be incapable of separating the hybrid matters into a separate bill?

The lawyer in him then came up with this.

The Leader of the House argued that any change in the constitutional arrangements at Westminster would be a breach of the Scotland Act.

Mr Straw said: "The only legal reason why the Scottish Parliament has this power is because the Westminster Parliament has delegated – devolved – its powers over these domestic areas to the Scottish Parliament. Power devolved is not power ceded – quite the reverse".

And to cap his comedy turn, he concluded

"It would in my view be both unwise and a breach of faith with the Scottish people for any significant changes in the Scotland Act to be made without the consent of the Scottish people in a further referendum."

So we need the consent of the Scots in a referendum before their MPs are stopped from voting on English issues!

The Scots Nats and Tory MPs for Scottish constituencies seem to manage not to vote quite well - maybe we have missed the reports of their constituents rising in arms in indignation at this dereliction of duty.

Mr Straw has a specially pompous voice when he uses the phrase "in my view" - as if his view was something to be taken special note of, as if he exercised independent thought, independent of the Labour party's naked party advantage.

The Herald also reports that David Cameron, fearing this argument "could get out hand", has ordered his troops to stop talking about it.

Let's be clear. This is more important than the trivial matter of which Tory MEPs sit where in the undemocratic european parliament. UKIP has an excellent policy on English votes on English issues, which goes beyond Lord Baker's ideas. But UKIP will doubtless focus on the obscure matter of the EPP today.